Fear The Walking Dead Episode 1 Rant

Fear the Walking Dead?

Fuck the Walking Dead.

Nothing happens in the main series. Even less happens in the spin-off series.

Every character is fine talking in exposition, 'Look, kid, you got bullied, but now you are tutoring your bully! You're smart!'

'How come you're not in class? Is it because you are smart enough to teach it, but you also don't always necessarily play by the rules?'

But then they have trouble talking about the dead rising, and cannibals. Why didn't the main character (I assume) just be straight up about the cannibal in the shooting gallery (I actually liked that line)?
And then the step-father went to the scene of the zombies? In LA? Fuck that. Even if your son was hallucinating, you are still in LA.

Which brings me to my next point. I'm not sure if it was only in the comics, or if it was in the show as well. But a big reveal is that the living people are the walking dead, not the zombies. Which makes sense for this show, since it's set in LA. In which case you should definitely fear the people. I think the zombies detract from what you should fear.

Also, what the fuck was up with that black kid being the drug dealer? And then wanting to kill his mate? I know exactly how that scene came up in the writer's room. The writer's created a character, that was meant to symbolise lost innocence of the main character (I'm sorry, I didn't take any names). Then later on the studio came to the writers and was like, 'Hey, nothing happens in an entire hour.' Then the writers just decided to make the black nice guy a drug dealer, and then a fucking murderer. In for a penny. And then the writers justify it by having it as a twist.

And how fucking stupid is the mother? I get it, AMC can't have a sympathetic woman on their channel. But for fuck sake. Someone puts 4 and 4 in front of her, and she has 2 sets of 4. 4 and 4 is 8. Figure it out. People are rising from the dead. Kids are downright telling you that zombies are eating people. You investigate a murder and walk up to the zombie and get bit? Good. You're a dumbass. But also, wouldn't it have been better if the mother wasn't a complete pile of shit?

Also, we know from The Walking Dead (now known as 'Not the completely shit one') that people come back from the dead regardless of being bit or not. The first episode takes place over a couple of days. Do you know how many people die a day? Fucking heaps. I'd say Family Guy was spot on. People would realise that people weren't dying in 10 seconds. It would be all over the news. It was just unreal that the only person who met 2 zombies was a heroin addict. Fucking hell.

I can't wait for the next episode. Just kidding. Fuck this show.

Burst Culture

Hi readers, thanks for your continued support. I see that this blog has been getting consistent pageviews. I've sort of left it running without adding to it. The big reason is I've started the site burstculture.com. Me and a mate from Uni have been posting heaps of content. It's been operational for a month and it already has more posts than I've put up here (granted I've stolen a few old posts from here).

It's a balloon bursting. 

I wanted to call the website Culture Burst, but someone had seen this blog and decided it was a good name. So they set up their own website with my name. But Burst Culture is a much better name. It's better alphabetically, and probably in other ways. I even have a logo on the website.

So check it out. It is a lot more on Movies and Television but we are also doing a podcast.

So thanks for your continued support, and if you want to read more from me, check out the website. Follow me on Twitter. Like us on Facebook. Do what you need to do.

I love you.

Jeff Smith's Bone

I just tore through Bone.

I was intrigued to read it as I had heard that it was one of the funniest comic books ever. Turns out I was thinking about Chew.

Regardless, Jeff Smith's Bone was fucking nuts.

I didn't know what to expect, I have the 1300 page black and white omnibus on my desk. It is a behemoth. The most apt way to describe it is if Carl Barks and J.R.R Tolkien put their works in a blender. It's an epic, high fantasy powerhouse. 

Three Bones from Boneville get lost in a medieval Valley. Fone Bone (Mickey Mouse), his cousin Phoney Bone (Scrooge McDuck) and his other cousin Smiley (Goofy) get ran out of Boneville and have to find their way back.

That's pretty much the story. Until they end up siding with the dragons against the rat creatures in a war that leaves no man or bone safe.

It's nuts. It has everything. The blurb for The Princess Bride would fit perfectly on the back of Bone.

I'm stoked that I didn't read Bone until after it was completely released. The individual volumes were released from 1991 until 2004. My life until I was 13 would have been waiting to find out what happened next. Reading it as an omnibus if I ever wanted to know what happened next I would just read another 100 pages.

The pacing was amazing, the character development was amazing, the world was completely fleshed out. I loved the heroes, the villains, the background characters. It would be amazing to own the coloured version, but an extra $90 for colours was too much for me, personally.

I'd recommend buying the book, because I like to flip through pages and smell them. But if you are interested Issue #1 is available for free, and in colour, on Boneville, Jeff Smith's website.

More than Meets the Eye Issue #1 Review

I'm not a Transformers fan. I had the toys when I was a kid in the 90's. I smuggled Scotch into the cinemas when the first movie came out. Optimus Prime turns into a truck and Bumblebee can't talk. But Humble had a Transformers comic bundle and I needed to donate some money to a children's charity. With all this in mind let's see what I thought about Transformers: More than Meets the Eye Issue #1.

The first chapter is titled The Death of Optimus Prime. Optimus Prime believes he is dead because he is in an unknown location. He believes it is either Robot Hell or Robot Heaven. He checks the co-ordinates on his GPS and it turns out he is on Cybertron, the home planet of the Transformers. He then tries to figure out if he is in the past or the future. It turns out he is in the present. He walks into town and is saddened to realise that he doesn't recognise any of the Transformers walking around and even more saddened that they don't recognise him. This goes on for about 5 seconds until he is reunited with his best friend Sideswipe.

I have no idea if this comic is a continuation of the cartoon or another comic series. But it is clear that there are millions of years of rich Transformers history that I am completely missing out on. Chapter 1 does serve as a good jumping point because the key points of Transformers are relayed. In 20 pages I understand that the Autobots beat the Decepticons in war. The Autobots (somehow) restored their home planet. Optimus Prime passed the leadership position to Bumblebee (who can talk now) and the Transformers hate the Autobots because they remind them of a war they all hid from.

There was one character that stood out from the rest, and that was Flamebot. He is a red Autobot that wants to go off on mythic quests instead of hanging around on a planet that hates him. Already I see him as the Indiana Jones of the Transformers Universe. I don't want to read about robots playing Game of Thrones, I want to read about Transforming Fire Robot going on adventures looking for Robot Knights.

Writer James Roberts shows new readers a glimpse of a much deeper universe. He doesn't assume that readers will know everything about Transformers and instead subtly guides readers through what they need to know. There were a couple of spelling errors that should have been fixed by now, especially for digital copies, but they were few and mostly unnoticeable.

The art by Alex Milne is ok. My biggest complaint I have with the art is that sometimes I couldn't figure out which robot was talking or if a robot had been introduced earlier. I don't fault the artist. There are a lot of characters that have to look a certain way and it just so happens that they end up looking alike. I can see this problem being remedied in later issues as I am pretty sure the story leads away from the densely populated Transformer planet and instead focuses on a lot less characters.

The story perfectly fits the comic book format, A movie with this many Transformers would need a budget of $500 billion. This story might be too mature for cartoons but could potentially work.

Overall it was a solid first issue and I will definitely read more. If you like the movies then you will like anything. If you remember Transformers fondly from your childhood you will love this series. If you barely have a passing interest in Transformers then you will enjoy this.

You can buy it here or download it here.

Ranking the Spiders in Edge of Spider-Verse

Edge of Spider-Verse is a Marvel Comic Series based on a bunch of different incarnations of Spider-Man. Here I have compiled a list of the Spider-heroes ranked on who deserves to be Spider-Man the most. The main criteria I based this list off were: powers, costume, and the alter-ego beneath the mask.

5. SP//dr

Peni Parker, a young Japanese girl with no powers and no parents. The destiny is strong in this one. Her father (presumably Peter Parker) was the SP//dr until he died. Aunt May and Uncle Ben adopt Peni and tell her that she is the only one that can control the SP//dr because of psychic spider-powers. I would argue that the SP//dr is a lot closer to being an Iron Man than a Spider-Man. It is a suit of armor that is controlled by a spider that is controlled by Peni.

The design of the SP//dr is visually cool to look at but it could have been anyone.

The Universe is similar in a lot of ways to the regular Marvel Universe with a battle between Spider-Droid (I can't keep typing SP//dr) and Mysterio and a Marvel Team-Up with a very cool looking Daredevil. 

The Universe would be cool to explore further but Peni Parker sucks. She was chosen by destiny to control a robot. Why can't they just build a different crime-fighting robot and have anyone but a Japanese school-girl pilot it? Peni makes absolutely no choices in her life, people tell her to be Spider-Man and she does it. Her villains could tell her to throw herself off a bridge and she would do it. I am not saying it was a bad story, it was really good, but Peni is the worst of the Spiders introduced in Edge of Spider-Verse.

4. I Walked with a Spider

What I like about Patton Parnell is that he is an active character. He accomplishes his goals as soon as they become goals. He gets stuff done. What I don't like about Patton is that he is a psycho. Put that guy down.

He gets bitten by a spider and becomes an evil Spider-Man. He keeps his prey preserved in webbing around his basement and eats them when he is hungry. The guy is a freak and is the furthest a Spider can be from being a hero.

But he makes his own choices and actually has powers, so that puts him ahead of Peni.

3. Spider-Man Noir

Spider-Man Noir is such a cool guy. It looks like he put close to zero effort into his costume and that fits his personality. It's dark and that allows him to not draw attention to himself (cougheveryotherSpider-Mancough) and he has a pistol holster. The Peter Parker of Spider-Man Noir is no Super Genius and he still has more sense than most. By having a gun he makes his job that much easier. Why walk up to a Super Villain and punch him when you can just shoot him?

Spidey-Noir still has a hero's heart and cares about his family and doing the right thing. He knows he has to show responsibility without having to take responsibility for everything. 

2. Gwen Stacey: Spider-Woman

 While Spider-Gwen is not the highest ranked Spider in this list, her story has easily been the highlight of Spider-Verse.

Spider-Gwen got bitten by the spider that normally bites Peter Parker. Insecure about being a whiny-bitch, Peter Parker turns himself into The Lizard. Spider-Gwen kills Lizard-Parker and learns a valuable lesson in responsibility, which is... don't kill people? I guess. Overall I like Spider-Gwen's transition from using her powers for fame to using them for heroics. By her killing Lizard-Parker it gives her a much more active role compared to the traditional story. You feel for Gwen because she made the mistake, she didn't let the mistake happen, and she struggles to deal with it. It's awesome.

Spider-Gwen's costume is also amazing. It is a derivative of the traditional Spider-Man costume but it has so much that is unique. The black and white separate her from most other Spiders. Her costume isn't sexualised, you can tell she has boobs but the attention is never drawn to them.

Gwen is truly deserving of being a Spider-Man and her recently announced ongoing series is proof that a lot of people feel the same way.

1. Aaron Aikman: The Spider-Man

Aaron Aikman is a self-made Spider-Man. In every other universe Peter Parker is the Spider-Man. If you were in a comic book and you were named Peter Parker (or a derivative) you could bet that you would be Spider-Man or at least be related to one. Aaron Aikman goes against destiny and makes himself Spider-Man. Aikman is a geneticist that was researching the healing properties of insect DNA and injected himself with some science magic and gained spider-powers. He also invented his own web-shooters, spider-stinger and rocket boots. In the three years Aikman has been Spider-Man he has been continuously refining his armor, weapons and accessories.

The Spider-Man lives in a futuristic version of the 1960's. This can be seen in the style of dress as well as The Spider-Man's Beatles do. The villains in this issue have never been seen as Spider-Man villains in other universes before either. The world is brand new with the only link to other Marvel Universes being that there is a Spider-Man.

Aikman is more deserving of the Spider-Mantle than any other Spider-Man in Edge of Spider-Verse. He continuously tried to better the way he combats crime as well as not just being handed the Spider-Man title from destiny. 

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Disagree? Good, that means you are thinking about it. Subscribe to this blog for more on Spider-Man and comics coming in the coming days or weeks. 

Guardians of the Galaxy Pinball Review (Android)

A couple of days ago I bit the silver bullet used to kill werewolves and I paid $3 for the Avengers Pinball and The Guardians of the Galaxy Pinball. This is big for me. I would rather spend $70 on a PS3 game than $3 on a mobile device.

I bought the game after seeing the movie, which was amazing (that's my review, 4.75 stars), and seeing this article, I didn't read the article. But I did read the title, 'Guardians of the Galaxy Pinball may be best table yet'. And boy did that title get me intrigued. I bought the Marvel Pinball App for $1 and it came with The Avengers table, I had to fork out another $2 for the Guardians table. It is worth noting that as of the time of writing this Marvel Pinball is free on iOS.

Now I have played a few pinball machines in my time, my father was a Pinball Wizard and my mother a Pinball Queen so I spent a lot of time playing them as a child. The only other digital pinball I played was Pokemon Pinball on the Gameboy Color, and that sucked major balls compared to the real thing. Shit I also played Sonic Spinball, but that is more of a spinball than a pinball so it might not count.

So how do the Marvel App Pinballs hold up compared to other digital titles I have played? It blows them out of the park. They look, sound, and feel exactly like a real table. Obviously they are smaller, and lighter, and portable; but other than that they are a true recreation of actual pinballs at a tiny fraction of the price.

While the Guardians of the Galaxy table is really good, and definitely worth the extra $2 there are some noticeable problems. The game starts with a Multiball, all the balls in the table come out at once and you muck around with them for a minute, this minute doesn't seem to affect the score too much, the highest I got from it was 2.2 million points. After the minute-multiball-mania, Peter Quill ( GuardianOfTheGalaxyMan) says that he needs his 70s inspired music and it is your job to hit a ball that launches at you into a specific ramp. This will net you an easy 5 million point headstart if you can land it. As well as the 5 million points you are also treated to a 10 second trailer with the title of the movie flying in space, it is terrible and takes away from the flow.

If you are trying for a high score you will need to repeat the minigame every time, all up it takes about a minute and a half, just to start a new game. It may be fun a few times, or every now and then but you could honestly just leave your phone on the desk until the real game starts and not really be penalised for it.

There are these cartoon figures littered around the table and they will dance around and spout typical pinball one-liners. Overall they add a layer to the game that could not exist on an actual table but there are certain point when they can get distracting. For example there is a skill game that has Peter Quill and Ronan (AntiGuardianOfTheGalaxyMan) shooting plasma at each other. Ronan also shoots plasma at your ball when he wants to vaporise it. It's fine if he wants to vaporise my ball, it's distracting when he wants to vaporise Peter Quill and it looks like it vaporises my ball. I have lost my ball because I thought it got vaporised only for it to fall down the guts of the table.

Those are my only two complaints. The stupid long intro, and the sometimes distracting nature of the cartoons.

I have spent the last three days playing this game. My thumbs are worn down and blistered from playing the game too much. I have probably racked up about 14 hours between the 3 tables I have. It is most definitely a fun game.

The ball feels like a ball, you never find yourself cursing the game for unfairly putting the ball in dire situations. You are always in control.

The music in the game is heavily inspired from 70s rock and it sounds amazing. It fits the tone of the movie by not being overly dramatic and by just being fun. It's the song in the trailer above if you want to hear it for yourself.

The voice-acting can get a little repetitive but the characters all have voices true to their movie counterparts. Quill will deliver one-liners differently than his movie counterpart but sticks to the tone. Groot is amazing, whatever he says in certain situations is exactly what he would say in a similar situation in the movie. Rocket, Drax and Ronan are perfect, Quill and Groot are obviously different voice actors, but it is a little harder to tell with Rocket, Drax and Ronan. Gamora was jibbed in this game though. She is told to wait in the ship at the start of the game, she tells Quill to leave his music behind and she sounds exactly like Peggy from Married With Children, otherwise she has no other lines in the game. Maybe a couple on her mini-pinball, but nothing worth remembering.

An amazing addition to this game are the Leaderboards. In the beginning (two days ago) I was always trying to improve my score, just for the sake of beating my score. Now I look at the scores of the world. Currently I am ranked 22nd in the world. It's a great feeling and now that I know I am competing against the world I can easily improve my score again.

The game is great despite its flaws. It is better value than buying a real pinball, it is better value than putting dollar coins into a pinball at the pub. So far it has cost me 30 cents for every hour I have played and the more I play it the better the value will be. If you are a fan of the old brick and mortar pinballs I recommend buying the game. If you hate digital pinballs, maybe don't buy it. If you think you will get your moneys worth out of it then you should definitely buy it. I bought it and I had no idea I was going to enjoy it so much. As a game I would give it 6/10, as a pinball I would give it 8.5 out of 10.

The Widespread uses of Multimedia Journalism

How common is multimedia journalism in the media I consume?

I am a student in his early-twenties, I live, breathe and eat electricity. What’s a newspaper? Newspapers are those dry magazines that used to be delivered daily so my parents could read their horoscopes and do the crosswords. They did, and still do, provide a recount of what happened the day before. If something happened on the 20^th of May you could read about it on the 21^st of May. Without an exceptional reason I would never read a newspaper. I would absolutely never pay for a newspaper, even with an exceptional reason.

I would subscribe to the Daily Bugle

How about television? Kids these days love television, right? When I was a little fat kid I had the television guide memorised. The television guide was actually in the newspaper, I’m not sure if it still is. The cartoons finished at 5.30pm on Channel 2, and then I would switch to the Channel 10 news to fill the void before The Simpsons started. But it isn’t the 90s anymore, why would I watch television? Everyone and his dog are trying to sell something to me and my dog. I live in the future, I’m not going to wait around until 5.30pm to find out something that happened at 4pm, why would I want to be an hour and a half behind the latest stories as well as sit through 10 minutes of advertisements?

I’m an iBoy. If something happens in Bulgaria I know about it instantly. As people we are given the gift of Government-level surveillance. The Australian Government wants to censor information; they don’t want a particular story getting out to the citizens? Have fun with that, because I read it on Reddit 3 hours ago. Multimedia journalism isn’t just widespread in the media I consume; the media I consume IS multimedia journalism. Traditional journalists get the same raw information that I get, I’m not special; I am one of billions.

Can multimedia journalism be structured in a linear fashion using multiple elements? It can, but why would it limit itself? If you read a multimedia story you are given the privilege to find out opposing information and judge it for yourself, you can watch video evidence of the story, you can see hundreds of pictures; each speaking a thousand words. A linear story? You would have to skip every hyperlink, not follow videos to find similar information, and not look up related articles. There are no doubt many linear journalistic stories on the Internet, but how is that special? It isn’t. It is an underuse of the technologies available. If people wanted linear storytelling then go watch the television or go read a newspaper.